Good morning dear Readers,
This has been such an extraordinary year, a year that turned everything we know on its head. Every single notion of ours was destroyed. The human world can never stop. It did. We can’t stay cooped up in the house. We did. The children have to go to school to learn. No, they didn’t. When and if we are invaded we are ready and will come up with a way to defeat the aliens. Instead, we found the enemy was within with roots going back several millions of years but has now been activated thanks to ideal conditions. We were not ready or able. What this year did though was give many of us a lot of time to observe and introspect about ourselves and our place in the world.
This allowed me to think about what I want Little Kulture to really say and how to say it. Did I want to share reading resources for children and parents? Did I want to share my parenting journey? Did I want to share instances of mindful or neglectful parenting? Did I want to talk about parents who struggle with parenting? Did I want to talk about young mothers? Yes, yes, yes and yes.
But I strongly wanted to tell my readers not just my thoughts but what they made me feel too. If I did not get vulnerable or share sometimes conflcting, complex thoughts with you dear reader, it would seem like I was peddling half-truths. The only form I felt that yielded to these wishes was a newsletter.
Like a mandala that is carefully designed and lovingly coloured only to be swooshed up into a colourful heap of different-coloured powder, yet again Little Kulture changes form.
In it I hope to present unvarnished posts about parenting, the struggle, the conflict and the irreplacable joy of it.
As I move through life I find myself thinking more about my own childhood and how my parents (my mother almost a child herself) raised me and how I parent my children. This back and forth is not a comparison but often leads me down the road of the importance of good parenting. For me the idea of good parenting is to be responsible for your child’s safety, give them a safe space to experience and voice their emotions and thoughts, provide autonomy to make independent decisions and strong to take feedback and use what they think will help them become better people.
These gold standards for children mean that as parents we must hold ourselves responsible to these same standards. If changes are in order we must change ourselves and remember the cardinal rule of parenting - the lesser you meddle with your children, better are their chances of turning out alright!
The older parent I am now looks at the younger parent I was and I’m appaled by the memories. Then I remember I was a naive recruit to one of the toughest jobs in the world where your boss doesn’t care how long or how hard you work. So many of us wing it with the help of parents, friends and the children themselves. As long as we do it with the best of our abilities, learn constantly and keep out the judgement, we can be good parents. Parenting like life itself is highly customised in parts but many general instructions work for most children. It would be good to remember as we parent that we are all unique but so is everyone.
Wishing you a better 2021 with lots of parenting adventures.